TITLE: SHAME NO MORE
Genesis 3-:7-11 (New living translation)
At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.8 When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man[a] and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. 9 Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?”10 He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked.”11 “Who told you that you were naked?” the Lord God asked. “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?”
Hebrew 12:2- We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.[a] Because of the joy[b] awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.
Romans 10:11 (kjv) – For the Scripture saith, whosoever believeth in Him shall not be Ashamed.
INTRODUCTION
Almost all of us have had dreams like that one.
But, have you ever asked yourself why?
Why is this type of fear of exposure and scrutiny so basic to the human condition?
It points to our shameful condition apart from the grace of God, and our need for the grace of God.
“the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed” (Gen 2:25).
There was no sin yet!
There was nothing wrong.
Shame did not exist.
There was nothing to be judged and nothing to be ashamed of.
Adam and Eve were everything God intended them to be.
“SHAME NO MORE”
I. DEFINING SHAME
II. WHAT GIVES SHAME POWER
III. WHAT SHAME DOES
THE KEY TO BREAKING SHAME POWER
- DEFINING SHAME
Shame plays a powerful role in our lives.
It controls our lives, dictates our actions, and dominates our thoughts.
Let me say it this way. . . The focus of guilt is behavior: That is, what we feel when we do something bad.
The focus of shame is identity: It is what we feel when we think we are bad.
Guilt say. . . “I made a mistake, so I must confess it to get it off my chest.”
Shame say . . . “I am a mistake, so I must hide it, so others don’t find out.”
Shame stays with us; it won’t let us go.
Shame weighs us down.
Shame retells us a story of our failures and mistakes.
Shame doesn’t lead us to repentance.
You see, guilt, if we let it, will bring us to the cross where we find forgiveness.
Brene Brown explains:
“There is a constant barrage of social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. Everywhere we turn, there are messages that tell us who, what and how we’re supposed to be. So, we learn to hide our struggles and protect ourselves from shame, judgment, criticism and blame by seeking safety in pretending and perfection.”
Shame usually follows a pattern — a cycle of self-recrimination and lies that claims life after life.
First, we experience an intensely painful event. Sometimes it’s due to our bad decisions or others’ bad decision in life.
Second, we believe the lie that our pain and failure is who we are — not just something we’ve done, or had done to us — and we experience shame.
And finally, our feelings of shame trap us into thinking that we can never recover — that, in fact, we don’t even deserve to.
What Does the Bible say About Shame?(show image of shame)
The Hebrew word here Buwsh pronounced Boosh. A verb, it means ”ashamed”, “covered with shame.” Fall into disgrace, normally through failure either of self, or of an object of trust.
The ancient Hebrew Pictographs of shame to illustrate this root created a picture of a “consuming fire” or eating you up from the inside.” Or “eat your heart out” It describe a strong feeling or intense emotion.
We also use fire as a synonym for what Consumes the Heart, like “Burning Anger” and the “flame of passion.” If we cannot tell ourselves no, it is because we are slaves to whatever masters us.”
So, what does it mean to be ashamed?
It portrays circumstances that include confusion, embarrassment dismay, defeat, humiliation disastrous decisions, immorality, foolishness and guilt from wrongdoing.
Shame in Genesis 3 – Everything is perfect, just as God intended God’s first couple, Adam and Eve lived in a state of innocence.
And then sin enters the picture, wielding the weapon of shame that forces them from perfect harmony into isolation.
So they hide in shame. Shame drives a wedge between their relationship with each other and with God.
Shame brought:
- David, a powerful man who abused his power to sleep with another man’s wife. But he got her pregnant. And out of fear of exposing his wickedness he tried to hide behind a cover-up that turned murderous (2 Sam. 11).
- The Woman at the well, her life was a wreck. After 5 failed marriages she stopped with the formalities. She came to the well when the sun blazed so she could draw water alone ad hide from the comments, the whispers, and the condemning looks (John 4).
- The woman who suffered from vaginal hemorrhage for 12 yrs. All the time: unclean, uncomfortable and uncomforted. She saw Jesus heal others and longed to receive His touch. But how could she ask him in front of the whole crowd? So, she sought to hide in anonymity (namelessness).
Curt Thompson in the Soul of Shame describes shame this way: “From the beginning it has been God’s purpose for this world to be one of emerging goodness, beauty, and joy. Evil has wielded shame as a primary weapon to see to it that that world never happens.” In other words, shame is used by the Evil One to break Shalom…Peace…Wholeness. It disintegrates us from God, our brain’s many parts, ourselves, others and God’s calling over our lives to advance his good and gracious redemption of this broken world.
- WHAT GIVES SHAME POWER
Adam and Eve were made in a perfect world, had perfect minds and bodies, and had perfectly close fellowship with God.
When they chose to sin against God, all of God’s creation was made subject to sin’s effects, including disease, decay, death, and separation from God for eternity.
Their first instinct was to hide from each other and God (Genesis 3:7-11).
They now stood guilty before God and were vulnerable to each other and Satan in a whole new horrible way.
Suddenly they were sinful, weak damaged people living in a dangerous world.
-They found themselves under God’s righteous judgment
Genesis 3:17-19 – because he listened to his wife, the ground us cursed because of you. You will struggle to scratch a living from it. It will grow thorn and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains.
John 3:19- And the judgment is based on this fact: God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil.)
-Exposed to other sinners’ sinful judgment and rejection
-Wide-open to the condemning accusations of the evil one (Rev. 12:10).
We also live in this dangerous world and have the same instinct to hide ourselves.
Because sin is alive in our bodies (Romans 7:23-But there is another power[a] within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me.)
Because we are beset with weakness (Hebrews 5:2- And he is able to deal gently with ignorant and wayward people because he himself is subject to the same weaknesses.))
The kind of shame we often experience is a potent combination of failure and pride.
We fail morally (sin), we fail due to our limitations (weakness)
We fail because creation is subject to futility and doesn’t work right (Romans 8:20- all creation was subjected to God’s curse).
We also fail to live up to other people’s expectations.
And because we are full of sinful pride, we are ashamed of our failures and weaknesses, and will go to almost any length to hide them from others.
This means pride-fueled shame can wield great power over us. It controls significant parts of our lives and consumes precious energy and time in avoiding exposures.
- WHAT SHAME DOES
Since pride and sin enter into our lives, shame has a great toll on us, I think we often view shame as a consequence of the fall. But I think it’s less of a consequence and more of weapon that is used against us.
Here’s what shame does to us:
- Shame Separates Us from each Other.
Fear, embarrassment at being exposed, hiding. Moments later, accusing someone else to escape scrutiny of own sin. Trying to throw off the weight of our sin. We hide and accuse. We don’t want to be responsible. In doing so, a wedge is driven into our most important relationship.
- Shame Keep Us Sick.
Alcoholics Anonymous has a saying: “We are only as sick as the secrets we keep.” It basically means that a secret keep in the dark grows and becomes more harmful, but once it is exposed to light or released, its power is lost.
Shame feeds us lies to keep us sick. It tell us that if we open up, people will leave us. Shame tells us it will hurt too much to be truly known. It tells us that our sins are too great that God doesn’t really love us.
- Shame Hijack Our Story
Stories are central to who we are. Whether you realize it or not, your life is telling a narrative. It wields immeasurable power in our lives. And shame knows that and directly attacks our narrative.
The Soul of Shame by Curt Thompson says: “Of all the things that set up apart from the rest of creation as humans, one feature stands out: We tell stories. No other creatures we know of tell stories the way we do. Whether we know it or not, and whether we intend to or not, we live our lives telling stories; in fact we don’t really know how to function and not to tell them.”
Ultimately, shame hijack our story. Changes our narrative, our life into something different.
Shame hijacks the story of God intended to tell through our lives and replaces it with much inferior one. One that brings death instead of life.
- Shame Makes Us Run. It makes Us Hide in the Wrong Place and From God
Sin distanced us from others and from God.
Adam and Eve sinned, and shame was used as a weapon to change the story God had intended to tell.
They were so burdened by shame and so overwhelmed that they didn’t want to stand in front of their glorious maker.
They hide, to be unseen, to cower in fear, to pretend it didn’t happen. They wanted to avoid God at all costs.
Like Adam and Eve, we often find our shame keeps us from God. Keeps us from being known by God. The devil knows this, if he can get us to move towards sin, he can hit us, hard.
-Hit us with regret
-Hit us with fear
-Hit us with embarrassment and shame
-Hit us so hard that can’t get up and walk to the foot of the cross
-Hit us so we move away from God, not towards repentance
-Hit us so we forget that God forgives
-Hit us we walk away from believing in God’s grace
Application:
Like the woman at the well, King David, and the Hemorrhaging woman, our shame frequently encourages us to hide in the wrong places. We hide in our homes or away from homes. We hide in our rooms and in our offices. We hide in our housework and yardwork. We hide behind computers and phones and newspapers and magazines. We hide behind earphones, Netflix and ESPN. We hide behind fashion facades, education facades, career facades, FB facades and pulpit facades. We hide in busyness and procrastination. We hide in outright lies or diversionary conversation. We hide behind sullenness and humor. We hide behind bravery and timidity. We hide in extroversion and introversion. We have our own sin cover-ups. Pride moves us to use whatever we can to hide our shame.
- THE KEY TO OVERCOMING SHAME’S POWER
Rather than trusting in the goodness and graciousness of God, they got to work trying to solve their own problem. They sewed fig leaves together in an attempt to cover themselves.
We can, like Adam and Eve, we try to solve our own problem. We continue the human game of trying to cover ourselves and to hide.
But just because pride moves us to hide and cover our shame in the wrong places doesn’t mean that our instinct to hide is completely wrong. It isn’t. We don’t need a place to hide, but we need to hide in the right place.
And there is only one place to hide that offers the protection we seek, a compassionate coverer, where all our shame is covered and we no longer need to fear: the refuge of Jesus Christ (Hebrews 6:18-20–So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. 19 This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary. 20 Jesus has already gone in there for us. He has become our eternal High Priest in the order of Melchizedek?
Jesus’s death and resurrection is the only remedy for the shame we feel over, our grievous sin- failures (Hebrews 9:26).
His Humanity and Humiliation
When we picture Jesus hanging naked on the cross, there we seen Him in His true and raw humanity.
As one of us, He died for us, There He experienced shame and beyond that, the agony of bearing our sin for us. He was gathering up our humanity in Himself and presenting it to God.
His pain was real. His blood was real. His thirst was real. There was nothing easy about what He endured.
As Paul said, it was His humility (Phil. 2:8- he humbled himself in obedience to Godand died a criminal’s death on a cross.) that caused Him to endure the cross.
It was His own humility there to be seen in the most raw and vulnerable conditions humans know . . .. nakedness.
Hanging naked in His innocence, He was clothed with our sin, that we in our guilty nakedness may be clothed with His righteousness.
“For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin; so that in him we might become the righteousness of God’ (2 Cor. 5:21)
And today we don’t have to hide because there is no more shame in Christ Jesus. Christ absolved us of all shame, because he endured all shame. He breaks our shame cycle by saying, “It is finished” (John 19:30), at His lowest, most shameful moment of his life – death on the cross and resurrection, defeating its reign and chaos in our hearts.
Enough. It’s done. Released. Gone. Done. Complete. As believers, we are secure.
There is nowhere else to go with our sin; there is no other atonement.
(There is no salvation in no one else! God has given no other name under heaven by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12)
-But if we hide in Jesus, He provides us complete cleansing (1 John 1:9).
-All God’s promises, which find their “yes” and “amen” in Christ (2 Cor. 1:20), become ours if we believe and receive them.
-And the grace that flows from these promises to us through faith are all-sufficient and abounding and provide for all other shameful weaknesses and failures (2 Cor. 9:8).
Jon Bloom says, “The key to breaking the power of pride-fueled shame is the superior power of humility-fueled faith in the work of Christ and the promises of Christ. Shame pronounces us guilty and deficient. Jesus pronounces as guiltless and promises that His grace will be sufficient for us in all our weaknesses (2 Cor. 12:9-10). Christ is all (Colossians 3:11). As we trust Jesus as our righteousness (Phil. 3:9) and our provider of everything we need (Phil. 4:19), shame will lose its power over us.”
That’s what happened to the woman at the well. She listened to Jesus and believed in Him, and her sin-wrecked life was redeemed and her shame destroyed.
That’s what happened to King David. He confessed his sin and repented (2 Samuel 12:13) and trusted the pre-incarnate Christ, and his guilt and shame, which was great, was imputed to Christ and paid for in full.
And that’s what happened to the hemorrhaging woman. Jesus did make her tell the crowd about her shame, and in doing so she received the healing and cleansing she needed. Jesus made her shame a showcase of his grace.
And this wonderful experience can also be ours. All it requires is child—like, wholehearted belief in Jesus (John 14:1- Do not let your heart be troubled, trust in God and also in me).
(Testimony)
In Your hand I lay my Own
That your story may be known
The perfect story written for me
On the Cross there hung your Son
With my story in His hand and when He penned it with the nail.
It is finished.
It was done, perfectly done. My old story changed in your hand
CONCLUSION
Shame tumbled us.
It came to thwart God’s plan and hijack our stories – to knock us down.
Unrecognized, it would have succeeded.
The devil wants to wreck anything that brings glory to God above himself. The devil offered, Eve accepted, the world defected.
Sin distanced us from God and others. That makes us run and hide.
God’s story of redemption is beautiful. God expresses how He clothes us through His grace and mercy. It all circles back to Jesus Christ. Even when we mess up- it is all about Him.
Remember this: “we can’t stand being accused when we stand forgiven.” Confess sin, accept grace, sin no more and rob the devil of his best tool.
